Love, Dating and Sticky Situations

Question of the Week:   My relationship seems to be moving ahead. We certainly love each other, and we have from the start, but we do have major differences. All my friends say as long as you love each other, nothing else matters. When you find love, everything else falls into place. Well I have found love - is that enough?   Answer:   All you need to know about relationships you can learn from making model airplanes.    A common mistake when making a model airplane is to start by putting glue all over the parts. That just creates a mess. The wrong bits get stuck together, wings get stuck to the floor, windows stuck on your fingers. It only complicates things when you introduce the glue too early.   The way to build a model airplane is to first organise the parts. Make sure the pieces fit together and nothing is missing. Then gradually apply the glue, and join the various segments, piece by piece, until the structure starts to take shape.   The parts may not fit perfectly at first. You may have to shave off some rough edges, or bend some sections into shape before they click. Minor imperfections can be overlooked, a dollop of glue can fix them up. With a bit of work it all fits together.   But if you find that there are parts missing, or they simply don't fit together, then you don't have what it takes to make an airplane. You can't use glue to join mismatched pieces, and certainly not to replace missing parts. Don't even try, just look for a better model.   Your relationship is a model airplane. You and your partner are the pieces, and love is the glue that sticks you together. Without the binding power of love, two individuals could never become one. But the power of love, like glue, can get you into a sticky situation. It must be applied carefully, because it could stick just about anything together. You can love someone who is simply not for you.   Before opening our hearts, we must ensure we have the right pieces to build a relationship. The building blocks of a solid relationship are shared values and common purpose. Our priorities in life, beliefs and visions for the future must fit together. We can have different opinions, different tastes and different ways of expressing ourselves. As long as we can share those differences respectfully, we can become one. But if our values are not in sync, then we simply have different futures, we are not going in the same direction.   This all may sound pretty unromantic. Model airplanes are not exactly the stuff of poetry. But think what's better, romantic dating that gets sticky, or a sticking together for a lifetime of romance....   Good Shabbos, Rabbi Moss   To subscribe CLICK HERE or email rabbimoss@nefesh.com.au   BINA SUMMER LEARNING EXPERIENCE DEC 25 - JAN 1 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   Session one: 10:00 - 11:00am   Choose from these four classes each day: Wed 25 December - Tue 31 December   Men's Talmud Shiurim with Rabbi Yaacov Chaiton Mitzvah of Living in Israel From Gemora Kesubos and an in depth analysis of classic and contemporary texts   OR   Women's Textual Shiurim:   Mon 30 Dec - Parsha Secrets with Dina Gourarie Tue 31 Dec - Hidden Meanings of the Amida with Rivka Aaron   OR   Hot Topics with Rabbi Aron Moss for Men and Women   Mon 30 Dec - Rabbinic Stance on Child Abuse Tue 31 Dec - What Percentage Can Charity Collectors Keep?     OR   The Best of Personal Growth with Rabbi Michoel Gourarie (Men and Women)   Monday 30 December - Happiness - Is it Worth Pursuing? Tuesday 31 December- The Role of Dark Emotions           Join BINA for our annual Summer Learning Experience and enjoy our wide variety of classes from leading lecturers and Rabbis from across the Sydney Jewish community.   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  Session Two - Lectures and Panel Discussion 11am- 12 noon   Mon 30 Dec - Judaism Versus the Real World - Professional Liability with Rabbi Elie Farkas   Tue 31 Dec- The Luz Bone - its location, purpose and significance with Rabbi Yaacov Chaiton   NEW!! THIS YEAR (night session) Monday Night 30 December 8:00pm - 9:15pm Perspective or Priority An interactive discussion, sparking robust and introspective debate on the priorities in your life with Rabbi Chaiton   Wednesday1st January 2014 LECTURE AND BBQ and a welcome for Moshe and Estee Gourarie (son and daughter in law of Rabbi and Mrs Gourarie)   2014 - Challenges and Opportunities  How the modern world is shaping our personalities, relationships and our functionality A special live video lecture with renowned USA psychologist Dr David Pelcovitz    CHILDREN'S PROGRAM ages 1-12 $15 per day or $70 for the week bookings essential office@bina.com.au      ALL CLASSES AT BINA 337 OLD SOUTH HEAD RD NORTH BONDI   WWW.BINA.COM.AU   Marriage preparation course at Nefesh - February 2014 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~    Course covers: - Jewish wisdom on relationships - The meaning behind the wedding ceremony - The Power of the Mikvah - Spiritual guide to love and marriage - A deeper look at men and women   Three Wednesday nights, February 5, 12 and 19 from 8:00 - 9:30pm at 128 Wellington St Bondi.   Course cost: Free for Nefesh Members, $150 per couple Non Members, $75 if one partner is not a Nefesh member. Includes separate Mikvah classes for brides.   Contact the office (office@nefesh.com.au) to book your places. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ To advertise here contact office@nefesh.com.au  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~    SERVICES AT NEFESH ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Friday Night Candle lighting 7.50pm (not before 6.38pm)  Mincha 6:10pm Shabbos service 6.30pm followed by Kiddush sponsored in honour of the yahrzeit of Chana bas Yessi   Shabbos Day Class 9am Service 10am -12:15pm followed by Kiddush sponsored by the Diamonds in honour of their December birthdays.   Mincha 7.45pm followed by Seudah Shlishis   Shabbos ends 8.52pm   Shachris  Sun Wed Thur (public hols) 8am Mon Tue Fri 7am   Latest Shema 9.21am

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Why is There So Much Traffic?

Question of the Week:   I am a little confused about when Shabbos starts. This week the advertised time for candle lighting in Sydney is 7:46pm, which is 18 minutes before sunset. But you start your Shabbos service at 6:30pm, ending before Shabbos begins! So what's the story? Can you say the Shabbos prayers when it isn't even Shabbos yet? Answer: The Jewish day begins at sundown. This is based on Genesis' description of a day as "it was evening and it was morning" - night first, then day. And so the Shabbos, the seventh day, begins at sundown on Friday. However, Jewish law allows us to bring in Shabbos early. We can extend the borders of holiness, and accept the Sabbath upon ourselves while it is still Friday afternoon. There is a certain window of time before dusk during which we can usher in the Shabbos, though the weekday sun still shines. This has cosmic significance. The sages of old predicted that history as we know it will only last for six thousand years. The seventh millennia will usher in a new age, the times of Moshiach, a time of peace and spiritual awakening, when all the world will join forces to serve G-d and live in harmony. Just as the week is divided into the six working days and the seventh day of rest, so too history is divided into six millennia of work and effort, perfecting the world, vanquishing evil and promoting goodness, culminating in the seventh millennia, a world of Shabbos, when the hard work will have been done and the busy world will finally reach tranquility. We are presently in the year 5774 from the creation of man, toward the end of the sixth millennia. It's late on the Friday afternoon of history. Now you can understand why the world is so crazy, why things change so quickly, and why there is so much traffic these days. We are in the middle of the frantic rush to get the world ready for Shabbos. These are amazing times. As the era of peace approaches, there is a shift in the spiritual mood. We are edging toward a more spiritual way of living, where the soul is as obvious as the body, goodness is more tempting than evil, and the mysteries of life are solved. But we need not wait until the seventh millennia to live on this higher plain. Just as we can bring in Shabbos early and accept it upon ourselves on Friday afternoon, so too we can start living a soulful life right now, on the Friday afternoon of history. Through studying Torah, particularly the deeper mystical teachings of Chasidism, we learn to see beyond the emptiness and superficiality of the material world, and connect to the Shabbos way of thinking.  Don't wait for Shabbos to come to you, bring it in early. Good Shabbos, Rabbi Moss   To subscribe CLICK HERE or email rabbimoss@nefesh.com.au   BINA SUMMER LEARNING EXPERIENCE DEC 25 - JAN 1 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   Session one: 10:00 - 11:00am   Choose from these four classes each day: Wed 25 December - Tue 31 December   Men's Talmud Shiurim with Rabbi Yaacov Chaiton Mitzvah of Living in Israel From Gemora Kesubos and an in depth analysis of classic and contemporary texts   OR   Women's Textual Shiurim:   Wed 25 Dec - Parsha Secrets with Dina Gourarie Thu 26 Dec - Defeating the Zodiac - How Chana's 7 sons confronted the stars with Nechama Dina Moss Fri 27 Dec - no shiur (please join Rabbi Moss or Rabbi Gourarie) Mon 30 Dec - Parsha Secrets with Dina Gourarie Tue 31 Dec - Hidden Meanings of the Amida with Rivka Aaron   OR   Hot Topics with Rabbi Aron Moss for Men and Women   Wed 25 Dec - Should Marijuana be Legal? Thur 26 Dec - Dinosaurs Fri 27 Dec - The Rebellious Son in the Torah Mon 30 Dec - Rabbinic Stance on Child Abuse Tue 31 Dec - What Percentage Can Charity Collectors Keep?     OR   The Best of Personal Growth with Rabbi Michoel Gourarie (Men and Women)   Wednesday 25 December- Precious Moments - Time Management with Jewish Values Thursday 26 December- Managing Conflict Effectively    Friday 27 December- Masculine and Feminine Energy (a formula from the weekly Parsha) Monday 30 December - Happiness - Is it Worth Pursuing? Tuesday 31 December- The Role of Dark Emotions           Join BINA for our annual Summer Learning Experience and enjoy our wide variety of classes from leading lecturers and Rabbis from across the Sydney Jewish community.   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  Session Two - Lectures and Panel Discussion 11am- 12 noon   Wed 25 Dec- Thank You For Not Making Me a Woman - with Rabbi Moss   Thur 26 Dec- To B(T) or to (FF)B A candid conversation on Jewish life as seen through the eyes of a Baal Teshuva and someone Frum from Birth   Fri 27 Dec- But I Bought it in Israel? Real case studies of what can be wrong with Mezuzot and Tefillin with Rabbi's Gourarie and Israel   Mon 30 Dec - Judaism Versus the Real World - Professional Liability with Rabbi Elie Farkas   Tue 31 Dec- The Luz Bone - its location, purpose and significance with Rabbi Yaacov Chaiton   NEW!! THIS YEAR (night session) Monday Night 30 December 8:00pm - 9:15pm Perspective or Priority An interactive discussion, sparking robust and introspective debate on the priorities in your life with Rabbi Chaiton   Wednesday1st January 2014 LECTURE AND BBQ and a welcome for Moshe and Estee Gourarie (son and daughter in law of Rabbi and Mrs Gourarie)   2014 - Challenges and Opportunities  How the modern world is shaping our personalities, relationships and our functionality A special live video lecture with renowned USA psychologist Dr David Pelcovitz    CHILDREN'S PROGRAM ages 1-12 $15 per day or $70 for the week bookings essential office@bina.com.au      ALL CLASSES AT BINA 337 OLD SOUTH HEAD RD NORTH BONDI     WWW.BINA.COM.AU   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ To advertise here contact office@nefesh.com.au  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~    SERVICES AT NEFESH ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Friday Night Candlelighting 7.46pm (not before 6.35pm)  Mincha 6:10pm Shabbos service 6.30pm followed by Kiddush sponsored by Hermann Tabacnik in memory of his father William Tabacnik (Zeev ben Tzvi HaLevi) and his sister Stephanie Robinson (Miriam bat Zeev Halevi).   Shabbos Day Class 9am Service 10am -12:15pm    Mincha 7.45pm followed by Seudah Shlishis   Shabbos ends 8.49pm   Shachris  Sun Wed Thur (public hols) 8am Mon Tue Fri 7am   Latest Shema 9.17am

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Foul Mouths and Dirty Toothbrushes

Question of the Week:   It seems that obscenity and foul language are becoming more and more acceptable. Swear words are used by politicians, sportsmen and even teachers, as if they have become a part of common speech. People don't even bother to write %#*#! any more. What is the Jewish view of dirty language?   Answer:   Foul language is spiritually unhygienic. It is like scrubbing the toilet with your toothbrush, and then using it as a toothbrush. If you wouldn't do that, then you shouldn't use the same mouth for profanity that you use for words of friendship, love and prayer. Like pure water flowing through rusty pipes, even words of love, when coming from a dirty mouth, cannot help but become stained.   Speech is a powerful gift. When used correctly, the spoken word can build and strengthen relationships, give comfort and support, sometimes even save a life. Our words can lift a heavy heart and inspire a lost soul. Words of prayer can reach the heavens. Words of care can go even higher.   The words we say do not just disappear. They hover around us, forming the air we breathe and the atmosphere in which we live. Holy words create an aura of holiness around us. Words that are obscene, slanderous, abusive or untrue foul the air, like spiritual pollution. These toxic emissions are the most dangerous of all.   In your home, there are two distinct brushes, a toilet brush and a tooth brush. But you only have one mouth. Flush out profanities, and keep the air around you fresh and pure.   Good Shabbos, Rabbi Moss   To subscribe CLICK HERE or email rabbimoss@nefesh.com.au   BINA SUMMER LEARNING EXPERIENCE DEC 25 - JAN 1 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   Session one: 10:00 - 11:00am   Choose from these four classes each day: Wed 25 December - Tue 31 December   Men's Talmud Shiurim with Rabbi Yaacov Chaiton Mitzvah of Living in Israel From Gemora Kesubos and an in depth analysis of classic and contemporary texts   OR   Women's Textual Shiurim:   Wed 25 Dec - Parsha Secrets with Dina Gourarie Thu 26 Dec - Defeating the Zodiac - How Chana's 7 sons confronted the stars with Nechama Dina Moss Fri 27 Dec - no shiur (please join Rabbi Moss or Rabbi Gourarie) Mon 30 Dec - Parsha Secrets with Dina Gourarie Tue 31 Dec - Hidden Meanings of the Amida with Rivka Aaron   OR   Hot Topics with Rabbi Aron Moss for Men and Women   Wed 25 Dec - Should Marijuana be Legal? Thur 26 Dec - Dinosaurs Fri 27 Dec - The Rebellious Son in the Torah Mon 30 Dec - Rabbinic Stance on Child Abuse Tue 31 Dec - What Percentage Can Charity Collectors Keep?     OR   The Best of Personal Growth with Rabbi Michoel Gourarie (Men and Women)   Wednesday 25 December- Precious Moments - Time Management with Jewish Values Thursday 26 December- Managing Conflict Effectively    Friday 27 December- Masculine and Feminine Energy (a formula from the weekly Parsha) Monday 30 December - Happiness - Is it Worth Pursuing? Tuesday 31 December- The Role of Dark Emotions           Join BINA for our annual Summer Learning Experience and enjoy our wide variety of classes from leading lecturers and Rabbis from across the Sydney Jewish community.   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  Session Two - Lectures and Panel Discussion 11am- 12 noon   Wed 25 Dec- Thank You For Not Making Me a Woman - with Rabbi Moss   Thur 26 Dec- To B(T) or to (FF)B A candid conversation on Jewish life as seen through the eyes of a Baal Teshuva and someone Frum from Birth   Fri 27 Dec- But I Bought it in Israel? Real case studies of what can be wrong with Mezuzot and Tefillin with Rabbi's Gourarie and Israel   Mon 30 Dec - Judaism Versus the Real World - Professional Liability with Rabbi Elie Farkas   Tue 31 Dec- The Luz Bone - its location, purpose and significance with Rabbi Yaacov Chaiton   NEW!! THIS YEAR (night session) Monday Night 30 December 8:00pm - 9:15pm Perspective or Priority An interactive discussion, sparking robust and introspective debate on the priorities in your life with Rabbi Chaiton   Wednesday1st January 2014 LECTURE AND BBQ and a welcome for Moshe and Estee Gourarie (son and daughter in law of Rabbi and Mrs Gourarie)   2014 - Challenges and Opportunities  How the modern world is shaping our personalities, relationships and our functionality A special live video lecture with renowned USA psychologist Dr David Pelcovitz    CHILDREN'S PROGRAM ages 1-12 $15 per day or $70 for the week bookings essential office@bina.com.au      ALL CLASSES AT BINA 337 OLD SOUTH HEAD RD NORTH BONDI     WWW.BINA.COM.AU   ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ To advertise here contact office@nefesh.com.au  ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~    SERVICES AT NEFESH ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   Friday December 13 Fast of Tenth of Teves    Friday Night Candlelighting 7.42pm (not before 6.30pm)  MINCHA 5:50PM Shabbos service 6.30pm   Fast ends 8.29pm   Shabbos Day Class 9am Service 10am -12:15pm Followed by Kiddush sponsored by the Lowinger and Robinson families in honour of the Lowinger's move to Melbourne. L'Chaim sponsored by anonymous friends to farewell the Lowingers.   Bar Mitzvah of Joshua Hucksteppe at 4.30pm   Mincha 7.30pm followed by Seudah Shlishis sponsored in honour of the call-up and wedding of Jason Schulman and Justine Berger.   Shabbos ends 8.44pm   Sunday Shachris 8am Weekdays 7am   Latest Shema 9.14am This email is sponsored by Keep The Glass

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